


welcome home, lover

by hyacinthis



Category: Captive Prince - C. S. Pacat
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Arguing, Comfort/Angst, Domestic, Domestic Disputes, Domestic Fluff, Dreams and Nightmares, Gen, M/M, Medication, Modern Era, Nightmares, Resolved Argument, Self-Indulgent, this is I N C R E D I B L Y self indulgent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-15
Updated: 2018-11-15
Packaged: 2019-08-23 21:40:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16626923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hyacinthis/pseuds/hyacinthis
Summary: Laurent closes his eyes and sighs. He inhales slowly then pushes some of his hair over his shoulder. Sometimes he wishes he could just disappear for a little while. Just long enough to get himself together, however long that may be. But he can’t. He’s forced to deal with his problems in real time, as badly as he doesn’t want to.“I…” He starts quietly, biting his lip. “I’m not broken, Damen.”





	welcome home, lover

**Author's Note:**

> lmaoo this was supposed to be like four pages long whOOPSIES

Laurent jumps when he hears the front door unlock, still in a sleep deprived haze. He sets his phone down, blinking tiredly as Damen walks in. He looks at Laurent, wrinkling his nose as he does. He shuts the door behind him and leaves his suitcase in the living room, walking over to Laurent at the kitchen table.

“Don’t tell me you were waiting up for me.” He says, leaning down to press a kiss to his forehead. “I told you I was going to be late.”

“No, I didn’t wait up,” he says, pushing up his glasses tiredly. 

“Nightmares again?” Damen asks, Laurent nods. “I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s okay.”

“How long have you been awake?”

Laurent unlocks his phone, glancing at the time.

“Since 1, fell asleep around eleven.”

“Do you have work tomorrow?”

“Mhm.” He says, rubbing his eyes beneath his glasses. “But I’m fine, I really am. I made myself some tea, answered a couple of e-mails, tried to go back to sleep, made more tea.”

Damen rolls his eyes, sitting down next to him. He reaches out and gently takes his hand, watching Laurent squeeze his larger hand. Damen presses a small kiss to his hand, tilting his head to the side as he watches him. When he’s tired like this, he looks like a corpse, and without fail it always makes Damen’s heart ache.

“Have you been taking your sleeping medicine?”

“Mhm.” He answers. “It’s stopped working, I don’t know why.”

“We’ll have to schedule you a doctor’s appointment again soon.”

“No, no, I’m fine.”

“Laurent…” He frowns. 

“How was the trip?” Laurent asks. “Did you and Nik have fun?”

“It was fine. How much have you been sleeping this week?”

“Damen-”

“I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

“I am, okay? I’m fine.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“I don’t know. I haven’t been keeping track.”

“Can you at least give me an estimate?” Damen sighs. Laurent rolls his eyes. “I’m just trying to help you.”

“I slept fine Monday night, woke up a couple of different times Tuesday night, slept fine Wednesday, couldn’t sleep Thursday, had a couple of nightmares Friday night, kept waking up Saturday night, couldn’t sleep Sunday night, and I slept fine last night.”

Damen stares at Laurent for what feels like an eternity. He looks down at the ring on Laurent’s finger and sighs. He shakes his head, rubbing his forehead. 

“I think we should go to your doctor and see if we can get you some stronger sleeping medication.”

“Damen, _I’m fine._ ” 

“I want to believe you, but what am I going to do when you exhaust yourself and get hurt?”

“I can handle myself, nothing like that is going to happen.”

“But it could, Laurent!”

“Lower your voice, Nicaise is sleeping.” He hisses.

They stare at each other for a moment, maintaining eye contact. Laurent stands, taking his mug with him and pouring himself another cup of tea. The hostility in the air isn’t a good feeling. But Damen is concerned and Laurent is defensive. Unfortunately for both of them, they’re both very thick skulled.

“Do you want some tea?” Laurent asks with a sigh.

“What kind?”

“Chamomile.”

“I’m okay, thanks.”

They’re quiet again. Damen watches Laurent pour some honey into his mug, then mix it in. He leans against the kitchen counter, staring down at his mug rather than Damen. Deep down, he knows that Damen has a point. But he isn’t going to admit it. He said he’s fine, he’s going to stand by that statement. He’s gone a couple of days without sleep and was fine. It isn’t any different now.

“How was the trip?” Laurent asks somewhat conversationally.

“Laurent, you can’t slither your way out of this conversation.”

“I’m not, I’m just asking you a question.”

Damen sighs. “It was fine, the weather was beautiful, I’d like to continue our conversation _please_.”

“I don’t get why you’re so obsessed with this!” 

“Because I love you, Laurent, and I care about your well being!”

“And I love you too, but _goddamn_ -”

“I can’t know what’s going on in your mind all the time, but I know when something’s bothering you! I know you, Laurent! I know when you need someone to save you from your thoughts!”

“I do _not_ need saving!”

“Then why haven’t you been sleeping?!”

Both of them stop when they hear the quiet sound of Nicaise’s feet pattering down the hallway. He rubs his eyes and leans against the doorway to the kitchen. He looks over at Laurent, then at Damen, unfazed by the fact he’s home from his trip. He shuffles to the refrigerator, grabs himself a water bottle, then turns back around.

“You guys are so fucking loud…” He murmurs.

“Hey, sleep good, okay?” Damen calls after him. “Love you.”

“Love you too.” Comes Nicaise’s groggy voice from down the hall.

Laurent continues to stare down at his mug, his blood boiling in his ears. He isn’t even really sure why he’s as mad as he is. He sighs and pushes his glasses up, then starts to walk out of the kitchen, grabbing his phone on the way out.

“Where are you going?” Damen asks.

“To bed,” Laurent answers coldly. “Since that’s where you want me to be all the time.”

“Laurent-” 

Laurent doesn’t answer, just continues to walk down the hall until they get to their shared room. He shuts the door then takes a seat by the window, sipping his tea. Damen groans, rubbing his face. He walks over to the front door, being sure to lock it, then picks up his suitcase and carries it to the couch. He lays down on it, throwing an arm over his face. 

Laurent’s tortoiseshell calico hops up into Damen’s lap. She paws at his stomach and Damen opens his eyes, looking down at her. He pets her head and she leans up into the touch, nuzzling his hand.

“I missed you too, Blue.” He says, ruffling her fur.

-

The next morning, Laurent gets up early to get Nicaise ready for school. After about an hour of sleep, he brews himself a pot of coffee then drives his son to school. He comes back home and lays in bed, staring at the ceiling as Damen snores on the couch. When Damen finally stops snoring and starts rustling around, Laurent feels his heart stop. He’s still angry. He shouldn’t be, but he is.

Damen pours himself a cup of coffee, then shuffles back to the bedroom. He knocks on the door once before pushing it open and leaning against the doorframe. Laurent doesn’t move as Damen takes a sip of his coffee. He wants so badly to lay next to him and run his hands through all of that blonde hair. But, the issue still isn’t resolved.

“Are you still angry?” He asks before taking another sip.

“I just wish you would listen to me when I tell you I’m fine.”

“And you know that I do, but when I can obviously tell you’re not fine then I’m going to offer help.”

“You sure do shit job of showing that.”

“ _Laurent_ -”

“Nicaise asked me if we were getting a divorce this morning.” Laurent sighs, taking off his glasses to rub his face.

“What?” Damen asks defensively. “Why?”

“Because you went on a week long guys trip with Nik and when you came home we were mysteriously fighting at four in the morning. If I were him, I would think the same thing.”

“You’re not suggesting-”

“No!” Laurent answers, sitting up. “No, no, no… I just…” 

He sighs and looks over at Damen before he falls back onto the bed. Damen stares at him for a moment before slowly walking over to the bed and sitting next to him. He reaches out and puts a hand on Laurent’s knee, to which Laurent responds by putting his hand on top of Damen’s.

“You know I hate arguing.”

“I do too.” Laurent answers. “You’re just so… Frustrating.”

“Ditto.”

They’re quiet again. After a couple of minutes pass, Laurent sits up and wraps his arms around Damen from behind. Damen reaches behind himself and rubs the back of Laurent’s head, sighing slowly. 

“How much sleep did you get last night?” Damen asks.

Laurent shrugs. “I fell asleep around 4:45 then had to get back up at 6:00 to wake Nicaise up.”

“Dear God, Laurent.”

“It isn’t my fault.” He responds defensively.

“I know it isn’t, that’s why I want to help you.”

Was it this hard to convince Laurent to see a doctor the first go round? Damen can’t remember.

Damen freezes when he hears Laurent try to hide a silent sob from behind him. He carefully pries Laurent off of him, then shifts to look at him. Laurent keeps his face hidden behind his long curtain of hair, adamant to make it seem like he’s somewhat fine.

Damen reaches out and gently tucks his hair behind his ear. He frowns, sighing slowly, before leaning forward and pressing a kiss to Laurent’s forehead. Laurent blinks back more tears, just adjusts his glasses and pretends that he’s fine.

“Laurent, my love,” he says gently. “What’s going on in that handsome mind of yours?”

He shakes his head and pushes himself off the bed, walking towards the closet. Damen frowns and stands, slowly following him.

“Talk to me, honey, please.”

“I have to get ready for work.” He answers thickly, pausing to wipe his eyes. Damen sighs. “Can it just wait until later tonight?”

Damen nods. “Alright.”

-

“Are you and dad getting a divorce?” Nicaise asks on the ride home from school.

“I haven’t seen you in a week, and this is the first question I get?”

Nicaise rolls his eyes and leans against the window. “You’re avoiding the question.”

“ _No._ ” Damen says firmly. “We’re not getting a divorce. Sometimes we just have disagreements.”

“Why did you leave for so long?”

“Nicaise, I don’t know why you’re all of a sudden so suspicious of me.”

“Can you blame me?”

_I suppose not._ Damen thinks.

“Nikandros and I haven’t taken a trip like that since I was _at least_ in my early twenties… Definitely before your father and I got married. We just wanted to take another trip like that, to feel young and wild again.”

“Fair enough.” Nicaise says, kicking his legs up onto the dashboard. “What were you two yelling about so early this morning?”

“Sometimes we just have disagreements, that’s all.”

“At four in the morning?”

Damen sighs, stopping at a redlight. He looks over at his son and shakes his head. He sometimes hates how similar he and Laurent are. Nicaise is almost a carbon copy of him.

“Your father is just… Thick skulled is all.”

“Is it because of his sleep problems?” Damen doesn’t answer, a little thrown off by the question. “He woke up screaming Friday night.”

“He’s been through a lot.”

“I know, I’m not complaining. Just didn’t know if you knew is all. I’d never heard him do that, I thought someone broke in or something.”

“Well,” Damen sighs. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there.”

“No biggie.” Nicaise answers. “What are we doing for dinner tonight.”

“Dunno.” Damen answers as they pull into the driveway. “What do you have in mind?”

“Pizza?” 

“I’ll run it by your father.”

Nicaise nods, taking Damen’s keys from him and walking to the front door to unlock it. Damen follows him, rubbing his face. 

“Blue!” Nicaise calls, clicking his tongue. “Come here, pretty princess!”

He pulls out his phone as he shuts the door, opening it up to text Laurent.

_Would you mind picking up a few pizzas on your way home?_

-

“Are you off to bed?” Laurent asks from the couch.

“Yeah,” Nicaise says. “I’ve got a big exam tomorrow morning, or something like that.”

“Something like that?” He raises a blonde eyebrow.

“Mhm.” He replies cheekily. “Thanks for dinner, love you guys.”

“Love you too.” Damen and Laurent respond in unison.

“No waking me up at four in the morning, alright?”

“No promises.” Laurent deadpans back.

They both wait until they hear Nicaise’s bedroom door shut to engage each other. Laurent closes his book and Damen turns off the TV. Blue hops up onto the couch and curls up in Laurent’s lap as he turns to face Damen.

“What’s going on?” Damen asks with a more gentle approach this time.

“I just…” Laurent strokes Blue’s back nervously. “It’s stupid, can we just move on?”

“You said we would talk about this.”

“I know but-”

“Laurent _please._ ”

Laurent closes his eyes and sighs. He inhales slowly then pushes some of his hair over his shoulder. Sometimes he wishes he could just disappear for a little while. Just long enough to get himself together, however long that may be. But he can’t. He’s forced to deal with his problems in real time, as badly as he doesn’t want to.

“I…” He starts quietly, biting his lip. “I’m not broken, Damen.”

“I know you’re not,” he answers gently, reaching out to cup Laurent’s cheek. “I’ve never once thought that you were.”

“I don’t want to be a project for you to fix… I know you worry about me like I worry about you but deep down I’m so scared that I’m exactly that, just something for you to fix.”

“Laurent-”

“So, when you suggest ideas like seeing doctors or getting better medicine or taking a break from work, I get defensive. I don’t mean to, I really don’t. But I just don’t want to be someone else’s project. I want to be my own problem to fix.”

“I know,” he says quietly. “But sometimes, you need help, and that’s okay.”

“It’s just hard for me to wrap my mind around that concept. I don’t know why.”

“And that’s okay.” Damen reassures. “When I offer help, I don’t ever want you to feel like I’m trying to fix you. I’m genuinely trying to help you get better.”

“Okay.”

Laurent leans forward and rests his head on Damen’s shoulder. Blue shifts in his lap, trying to find a comfortable position again, but quickly acclimates. Damen wraps his arms around his husband, squeezing him gently. He presses several kisses to the crown of his head before tucking some hair behind his ear.

“Nicaise told me you woke up screaming a couple of nights ago.”

Laurent sighs. “It wasn’t as bad as he makes it out to be. I was fine after a couple of seconds.”

“I believe you, I’ve been there when something like that has happened before. It just really startled him is all.”

“I know and he and I talked about it.”

“I know that you don’t want me to fix you,” Damen says. “But I really think we should try upping your medication.”

Laurent goes quiet for a long time, almost nervously petting Blue. Damen feels some anxiety rise up into the center of his chest.

_Great._ He thinks. _I just started another fight, didn’t I?_

“I’ll call my doctor tomorrow.” Laurent says quietly.

“What?” Damen asks in disbelief. “Really”

“Yes.” Laurent answers as he lifts his face from his shoulder. “I’ll call her first thing tomorrow morning.”

Damen looks at Laurent fondly, a warm feeling bubbling in his chest. Despite how hard it is for them to communicate sometimes, it’s all worth it. Damen loves Laurent more than anything in the world and he doesn’t want anything to ever happen to the little family they have together.

He leans forwards and presses a tender kiss to Laurent’s soft lips. They both hold it, Laurent’s arms around Damen’s neck and Damen’s hands lost in Laurent’s hair. They pull away and Laurent can’t help but smile a little.

“See how much easier things are when we talk it out?” Damen asks softly

“Yeah,” Laurent answers. “I love you so much. I’m really lucky to have you.”

“And I’m lucky to have you too.”

**Author's Note:**

> also, just so everyone knows: laurent totally has tortoiseshell glasses just to match his cat ;p  
> i hope you guys enjoyed this, i really love the little modern au setting i have all planned out in my head  
> i love feedback, so be sure to leave me something nice in the comments!!


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